Lovely Smell...bad results....

So today I decided I'd face my nemesis- bread. I had a simple bread recipe and decided to give it a try.
Its Everything Braid Bread. I carefully followed the recipe, doing exactly what it said, measuring as carefully as possible. Taking my time, making sure everything was right. I got through the 1st rise thinking I'm golden! Look at the rise on that! Braided the bread, left it to rise, came back and hour later..nothing...2 hours later..nothing. It was already hard. Rock anyone? You don't really need that tooth right?

So I prayed silently over my rock bread, and thought maybe while it bakes it will magically rise and become beautiful and delicious. Otherwise I'm going to end up with two doorstops.  I slid the oven door shut, with another little prayer, and left the room. The whole time I'm smelling this amazing aroma from all the spices and seeds on the bed, thinking its going to be amazing. It beeps. I slowly walk into the kitchen, and slowly open the oven door as though it the gingerbread man going to pop out at me...and I see it. One flat, lifeless doorstop. It didn't fluff up at all, I think it shrunk. I've made shrinky dinks bread. Lovely.

However, if you are able to produce a lovely loaf of bread then this recipe would be wonderful. Even if you just make your regular white bread dough, then roll it out to 12x8, cut it into 6 long strips, take three and braid, put it on a greased baking sheet, and repeat with the next 3 strips.  Let it rise for about an hour more, brush it with one egg + 1 T. of water, and then sprinkle a mixture of 1 tsp. each of poppy seeds, sesame seeds, kosher salt, toasted onion flakes and dried rosemary. Bake at 400* for 25-30 minutes...tap bread, if it sounds hollow its done. Mine sounds like hitting piece of cherry hardwood. Bummer.

I hope that my horrible experience doesn't deter you from trying this bread. The smell is absolutely amazing.  I would even consider mixing some of the herbs into the dough for extra flavor. Plus if I think about it, this whole failure will actually save me money. No need to buy the dogs chewies this week. We're set now.