Finding Balance

January was a month of chaos in this house.

I went to work for the first time in 8 years. Can you believe it? I got a job doing housekeeping at a local hotel.
The job did NOT turn out like I thought. I thought housekeeping would be perfect for me. Its what the past 8 years have been about...cleaning my house, keeping things orderly. HOWEVER...when its someone elses blood on the sheet, and someone else's poop that you are looking at, and knowing that you have to get all the hair out of the bathroom or fail your room inspection...things take on a new view. To do housekeeping you have to wear a sort of veil over your mind...you cannot think deeply about what you are doing or what you are touching. You don't want to know whether that hair is from a balding man, or his nether regions. In the span of a week I had to pull poopy toilet paper that had been put in a toilet and basically filled it so that it couldn't be plunged, out with my hand in a glove and garbage bag...risking my health and lunch for $8.50 an hour. I cleaned hundreds of hairs out of countless bathrooms, found blood on a comforter, had to do a maintenance report for a clogged sink in which some trucker clogged trying to dump out his cup of chew, got a 5 CENT...yes cent...tip, cleaned ash trays over flowing with cigarette butts, the list could go on and on. The job was not for me. I worked my ass off when I was there, and collapsed when I got home. Making 15-20 beds a day was like doing endless squats..a great workout, but painful once you sat for more than 5 minutes. In the end I quit, childcare was difficult to find on weekends, my daughter wasn't handling it well, and I felt like I was a whiny baby every time I talked to my husband.

However I did come away with a whole new respect for housekeepers and what they do. The ladies who I worked with did it quickly efficiently and were strong people. I give them a huge amount of respect. I also came away with a new outlook on my husband's life. He works in a job he doesn't enjoy (would you like to be surrounded by murders and gang members everyday yelling horrible things at you? and threatening your safety?) I give him alot more credit and respect, especially when he says he's tired. I get that now.
Third...I am grateful for my life. The life I craved and almost grieved over while I was working. All I wanted to do was clean my house and cook and be there to take care of my family, and spend time with my friends and do my PTO things.

Now I am back at work, luckily its a schedule that matches my daughters. I'm subbing for classified teachers in the school district where I live. I seem to be able to have enough work that I could almost do it everyday. I know that I need to step it up. There are days that I'd rather be chatting at the school with my friend and PTO President Jacque as we do posters for PTO events, or helping plan out the school carnival, more than work. I know I need to step it up and work more and rarely turn down jobs. This job has longer hours but is much more fulfilling. It will challenge me in ways that I need to be challenged. It will allow me to grow and learn. I can't live in a bubble in my house, cleaning and cooking, and doing the same things over and over. I have a wonderful friend, a PTO board position that gives me many things to do and help out my daughter's school, and a job that allows me to learn and grow, which I enjoy. Its time to enrich my life.

Now don't think I won't be cooking or cleaning! HA! I'm currently looking for yummy Valentine's Day treats, spent the rest of my scrapbooking gift certificate from Christmas, getting some wonderful supplies to do some of my Grandma GoGo's photos, and still fighting the endless fight against dirty laundry and dishes. But now I do it with a smile on my face...well most of the time.